Dating In Your 30s As A Single, Sober Mama

By Megan Harmony

OMG, I had the best date ever! I started freaking out while getting ready, it had been almost three years since I went on a date. What do I wear? Hair up or down? Should I wear a dress or jeans and a nice shirt? Maybe I should curl my hair? I probably should have shaved, damnit (into the shower I go). Then I started contemplating the big life questions, What am I doing here? What’s my purpose in life? What impact do I want to make in this world? Did I pack my daughter her toothbrush? The mental chatter with myself went on and this all happened in maybe a minute or two while I brushed my teeth, did my makeup and got dressed (a few different times). Then the self pep-talk started. You are so beautiful. I know your nervous Meggers (name for the little girl inside of me), but I’m big and I’ll take care of you, we are going to have so much fun!

I went out and had an amazing dinner, it was nice to be out amongst the crowd of people.  The food was delicious and I splurged a little and instead of just getting a pop, I had a virgin daiquiri. How risque! The company was delightful, there was conversation about everything and anything and I really felt listened to. The movie was hilarious and I literally belly laughed right in the middle of the theatre but I didn’t care, nor was I embarrassed.

It was the perfect evening and I felt like I had been treated like the queen that I am. I felt respected and appreciated and ready to do it again, soon.

The beauty of this story is that it is true. Are you aching to know who I went on this date with? It was me! The man I was supposed to go on the date with wasn’t able to come due to family circumstances but I had made a commitment to myself that I would step out, and I honored that. In doing so, I kept a promise to myself that I would start dating again and I experienced a beautiful side effect to my decision. I fell in love with myself that night, all over again. The conversations that took place within the depths of my soul and my mind were so wonderfully beautiful. Through keeping this commitment to myself and using my imagination a little, pretending I was with my dream guy while out for dinner and a show, I created space in my heart for this in the future. I could have chosen to say F it and just stay home in my cozy pajamas and curl up with comfort foods, but I wouldn’t be letting the Universe know that I am ready to get back out there and try this dating thing again.

When I arrived home that night, I felt soul-full! My cup was overflowing and I was ready to create. I wrote poetry and possible song lyrics. I worked on my writing assignments and everything just flowed from me. I needed that time with myself, by myself, in order to give back to myself.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and getting excited about a date with myself reminded me how awesome I am and how much the world needs me to step into that light. I haven’t been the same since. I am standing in the truth that “he is on his way” and when people ask me how my date went, I can answer with complete honesty in saying that it was the best date I’ve ever been on and I’ll be doing it again very soon.

By falling in love with myself fully and completely, I walk a little lighter; I’m more fun to be around, I’m no longer afraid of how I show up. I love and accept myself wholeheartedly and nothing stands in the way of all my hopes and dreams.

Fall in love fully and completely with the divine nature within you, and share her glory with the world every chance possible.

Megan Harmony


One Comment

  1. So inspiring Megs. I’m happy to hear you were able to flip a situation, that most would take as a negative, and make it a positive one. I can’t wait to hear about your next date. Be it with yourself, or another human.


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